Do we have to serve each other divorce papers? That feels so confrontational.
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Not in California. As of January 2026, couples can file together at the courthouse using a joint petition — no process server, no confrontational paperwork, no one being "served." If you're approaching this amicably, the legal process can reflect that from the very first step.
What if we don't agree on everything in mediation?
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That's actually what mediation is designed for. My job isn't to show up when everything is already settled — it's to help you have safe, productive conversations about the things that feel hardest to talk about. I mediate with Southern California Family Mediation, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit serving the highest-need families in Los Angeles. Even there, we reached resolution in over 90% of cases in the first quarter of 2026.
I'm ready to move forward, but my spouse won't engage. What do I do?
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The most important thing I can tell you: don't try to convince them. The moment you're selling mediation, they're resisting it. What works better is curiosity — asking them what their concerns are, and actually listening to the answer. The worksheet above walks you through how to identify what kind of resistance you're dealing with — and gives you specific language for each.
Open the worksheet →
We genuinely don't know if we want to divorce. Is there a process for that?
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Yes — and it's worth knowing it exists before you make any decisions. I offer a structured discernment process: four sessions designed specifically for couples where one or both partners aren't sure. At the end of those four sessions, most couples have arrived at one of three paths: moving forward with divorce, committing to work on the marriage, or agreeing to a defined period of status quo while they think further.